情書 傑拉德·杜瑞爾

四月拖更,按既定的更新規則,將存稿按四月第1期發佈。


Gerald Durrell,英國著名作家、物種拯救家,創立了澤西動物園,在保護野生動物上取得了巨大成就。這封他於1978年寫給妻子的情書,充滿了含蓄的浪漫。


我原以爲借物言志是一種中國人才獨有的自古流傳至今的含蓄。以爲只有我們的文人才能讓家國情懷在廣廈千萬間裏鬱結,讓思念在妻死之年手植的枇杷樹下熾盛,讓愛在”我從此不敢看觀音“裏靜默生長。

後來我讀到了夏目漱石。讀到了他不敢直視雙眼的羞怯,讀到了他只敢大膽地對着日本的月亮說月色真美。我以爲這是東亞儒家文化圈才特有的浪漫情懷。

再後來我偶然讀到了英國作家傑拉德寫給妻子的情書。

他說,我看過千次日出月落。我跨過無數山和海洋。我聽過見過世間萬千。

傑拉德熱愛自然,花了大半生的精力拯救瀕危動物。他愛着世間美好的一切,但是情書末尾他說:

這一切經歷無你陪伴,使我深感遺憾。

這一切經歷若是有你,是我最大期盼。

我情願將這一切放棄,換與你一刻相伴。

整篇文章的絕大部分都在敘述他一生經歷和所見所聞。山川大海,冰川熱帶;細蝶猛虎,飛鳥鯨魚;礦洞幽暗,明月高懸,自然之波瀾壯闊,生命之千姿百態,若不是真實體驗過,絕不會寫得這樣飽含深情。這部分內容豐富,文筆翔實,形象斐然,功底深厚。臨近結尾短短兩段才款款告白,用通篇的自然熱愛,去反襯他對妻子的愛之深,決心放棄之堅定。

世間美好千般萬種,生命誠可貴,自由價更高。若爲愛情故,二者皆可拋。

春風十里,不如你。

盈盈一水間,脈脈不得語。

是的,一切盡在不言中。斯人若彩虹,遇上方知有。有句話說:一個人想要在愛裏獲得幸福,這個人必須既懂人性,又懂愛情。

我不懂人性,也不懂愛情。但倘若愛情的本質是一種自我滿足,那麼我想,每一個在愛中做出過犧牲,在愛裏“我將無我”的人,看到這裏,都會被這封情書深深打動吧。


情書原文附上:

I have seen a thousand sunsets and sunrises,

on land where it floods forest and mountains

with honey-colored light,

at sea where it rises and sets

like a blood orange in a multi-colored nest of cloud,

slipping in and out of the vast ocean.


I have seen a thousand moons:

harvest moons like gold coins,

winter moons as white as ice chips,

new moons like baby swans' feathers.


I have seen seas as smooth as if painted, colored like shot silk:

or blue as a kingfisher,

or transparent as glass,

or black and crumpled with foam,

moving ponderously and murderously.


I have felt winds straight from the South Pole,

bleak and wailing like a lost child;

winds as tender and warm as a lover's breath;

winds that carried the astringent smell of salt and the death of seaweeds;

winds that carried the moist rich smell of a forest floor,

the smell of a million flowers;

fierce winds that churned and moved the sea like yeast,

or winds that made the waters lap at the shore like a kitten.


I have known silence:

the cold, earthy silence at the bottom of a newly dug well;

the implacable stony silence of a deep cave;

the hot, drugged midday silence

when everything is hypnotised and stilled into silence by the eye of the sun;

the silence when great music ends.


I have heard summer cicadas cry

so that the sound seems stitched into your bones.

I have heard tree frogs in an orchestration

as complicated as Bach,

singing in a forest lit by a million emerald fireflies.

I have heard the Keas calling over the grey glaciers

that groaned to themselves like old people,

as they inched their way to the sea.


I have heard the hoarse street vendor cries of the mating Fur seals

as they sang to their sleek golden wives,

the crisp staccato admonishment of the Rattlesnake,

the cobweb squeak of the Bat,

the belling roar of the Red deer knee-deep in purple heather.


I have heard Wolves baying at a winter's moon,

Red Howlers making the forest vibrate with their roaring cries.

I have heard the squeak, purr and grunt

of a hundred multi-colored reef fishes.

I have seen humming birds flashing like opals round a tree of scarlet blooms,

humming like a top.


I have seen flying fish,

skittering like quicksilver across the blue waves,

drawing silver lines on the surface with their tails.

I have seen Spoonbills flying home to roost

like a scarlet banner across the sky.

I have seen Whales black as tar,

cushioned on a cornflower blue sea,

creating a Versalles of fountain with their breath.


I have watched butterflies emerge and sit,

trembling while the sun irons their wings smooth.

I have watched Tigers like flames,

mating in the long grass.


I have been dive-bombed by an angry Raven,

black and glassy as the Devil's hoof.

I have lain in water warm as milk, soft as silk

while around me played a host of Dolphins.



I have met a thousand animals

and seen a thousand wonderful things.

All this I did without you.

This was my loss.

All this I want to do with you.

This will be my gain.


All this I would gladly have forgone

for the sake of one minute of your company,

for your laugh, your voice;

your eyes, hair, lips, body;

and above all, for your sweet, ever surprising mind,

which is an enchanting quarry,

in which it is my privilege to delve.

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